TS Chuck Norris :)

Chat about anything. Non-TS related.

Moderator: Forum Moderators

User avatar
Whiplash
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 2325
Joined: Sun Apr 19, 2009 4:57 pm
Location: Bosnia

TS Chuck Norris :)

Post by Whiplash » Sat Feb 13, 2010 6:26 pm

-Chuck Norris got lap record on Closkwise with Slider and he didn't drift at all.
-Chuck Norris played Jn_Wheel and he didn't type "what a stupid track" after he drove it.
-Chuck Norris likes Jn_Wheel.
-Chuck Norris played PunaBall in team with Whiplash and they won.
-Chuck Norris never get mad in PunaBall.
-Chuck Norris banned dede.
-Chuck Norris touched reirom while racing and reirom didn't complain.
-Chuck Norris likes reirom.
-Chuck Norris never got lags in terra.
-Chuck Norris made F1 car and Shyguy likes it.
-Chuck Norris has been chat with Matti.
-Chuck Norris can see difference between Pingu's and Mike's car.
-Chuck Norris managed to drive 2 laps in a row on Sc_Winter.
-Chuck Norris will be 5th member of "Plus Team".
-Chuck Norris thinks that he can beat Tijny in F1 league.
-Chuck Norris loves this game more then Whiplash. :wink:
Last edited by Whiplash on Sun Feb 06, 2011 12:36 pm, edited 2 times in total.

User avatar
dede
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 3314
Joined: Mon Apr 10, 2006 10:29 am
Location: Milan (Italy)
Contact:

Post by dede » Sat Feb 13, 2010 6:34 pm

looooooooool

nice job :lol:

User avatar
Whiplash
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 2325
Joined: Sun Apr 19, 2009 4:57 pm
Location: Bosnia

Post by Whiplash » Sat Feb 13, 2010 7:12 pm

dede wrote:looooooooool

nice job :lol:

Tnx. :wink: Maybe someone else will get inspiration for more of it. :)

Tijny
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 1514
Joined: Sat Nov 06, 2004 7:59 pm
Location: Netherlands

Post by Tijny » Sat Feb 13, 2010 7:51 pm

- Chuck Norris drove a Spinner and enjoyed it.
- Chuck Norris can lap other players in a 1-lap race.
- Chuck Norris can escape from a cage after falling in. Easily.
- Chuck Norris once broke a lap record without even driving a single lap.

User avatar
Whiplash
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 2325
Joined: Sun Apr 19, 2009 4:57 pm
Location: Bosnia

Post by Whiplash » Sat Feb 13, 2010 8:15 pm

Tijny wrote:- Chuck Norris drove a Spinner and enjoyed it.

:lol: Mike will especially like this one.

User avatar
shyguy1001
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 1111
Joined: Sat Aug 29, 2009 5:35 pm
Location: United Kingdom

Post by shyguy1001 » Sat Feb 13, 2010 8:24 pm

- Chuck Norris can wank a track by thinking about it
- Chuck Norris can win a race against dede...driving backwards
- Chuck Norris can drive the datsun without looking like he is drunk
- Chuck Norris has never landed off of the track in Jn_Launcher. Ever.
- Chuck Norris has never overtaken anyone, ever. It has never being necessary.
- Chuck Norris never makes a pit stop. He is fast enough with no fuel.
- Chuck Norris played a 250 lap race of TSB_Monaco without touching the wall
- Chuck Norris played a 250 lap race of VeryLongTrack and didnt get bored.

User avatar
Whiplash
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 2325
Joined: Sun Apr 19, 2009 4:57 pm
Location: Bosnia

Post by Whiplash » Sat Feb 13, 2010 8:27 pm

shyguy1001 wrote:- Chuck Norris can wank a track by thinking about it
- Chuck Norris can win a race against dede...driving backwards
- Chuck Norris can drive the datsun without looking like he is drunk
- Chuck Norris has never landed off of the track in Jn_Launcher. Ever.
- Chuck Norris has never overtaken anyone, ever. It has never being necessary.
- Chuck Norris never makes a pit stop. He is fast enough with no fuel.
- Chuck Norris played a 250 lap race of TSB_Monaco without touching the wall
- Chuck Norris played a 250 lap race of VeryLongTrack and didnt get bored.

ahahahaahhahahahahahahahahahahahah
Man, I'm crying. :lol:

User avatar
dede
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 3314
Joined: Mon Apr 10, 2006 10:29 am
Location: Milan (Italy)
Contact:

Post by dede » Sat Feb 13, 2010 9:08 pm

- Chuck Norris once received the promised share on TS sales from JGG
- Chuck Norris drove 0.3 off the Speeder lap record in Forestry by finding a new trick
- Chuck Norris always finds a spot in the PB autoserver
- Chuck Norris once played balls against Sir Lagalot, who didn't complain about lags
- Chuck Norris taught to reirom not to make four posts in less than three minutes
- Chuck Norris read this topic and he didn't understand why all people laugh about it

User avatar
Whiplash
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 2325
Joined: Sun Apr 19, 2009 4:57 pm
Location: Bosnia

Post by Whiplash » Sat Feb 13, 2010 9:12 pm

dede wrote:- Chuck Norris once received the promised share on TS sales from JGG
- Chuck Norris drove 0.3 off the Speeder lap record in Forestry by finding a new trick
- Chuck Norris always finds a spot in the PB autoserver
- Chuck Norris once played balls against Sir Lagalot, who didn't complain about lags
- Chuck Norris taught to reirom not to make four posts in less than three minutes

- Chuck Norris read this topic and he didn't understand why all people laugh about it


:lol: This one with Sir Lagalot is the best.

User avatar
Whiplash
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 2325
Joined: Sun Apr 19, 2009 4:57 pm
Location: Bosnia

Post by Whiplash » Sat Feb 13, 2010 9:30 pm

Chuck Norris already wank the Cvoprose GP and he already got better lap time then Tijny. :P
Chuck Norris will show to Tijny the best driving line on it. :P
How did Chuck Norris discover TS game??? He typed "Full Contact" in google search.
Last edited by Whiplash on Sat Mar 27, 2010 9:49 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Tijny
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 1514
Joined: Sat Nov 06, 2004 7:59 pm
Location: Netherlands

Post by Tijny » Sun Feb 14, 2010 4:34 pm

- Chuck Norris does not drive like a maniac. Maniacs drive like Chuck Norris.
- The average track has 16953 places where Chuck Norris can overtake you, including the track itself.
- Chuck Norris has never broken the middle line rule in Punaball. Chuck Norris does not need to be on the opponent's side to score.
- Chuck Norris has never been blocked in a game of Punaball. He simply goes through his opponents.
- No one has ever been able to tell Chuck Norris' car color, that's how fast he is.
- Chuck Norris does not need an internet connection to play online.

User avatar
Whiplash
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 2325
Joined: Sun Apr 19, 2009 4:57 pm
Location: Bosnia

Post by Whiplash » Sun Feb 14, 2010 5:16 pm

Tijny wrote:- Chuck Norris does not drive like a maniac. Maniacs drive like Chuck Norris.
- The average track has 16953 places where Chuck Norris can overtake you, including the track itself.
-Chuck Norris has never broken the middle line rule in Punaball. Chuck Norris does not need to be on the opponent's side to score.
- Chuck Norris has never been blocked in a game of Punaball. He simply goes through his opponents.
- No one has ever been able to tell Chuck Norris' car color, that's how fast he is.
- Chuck Norris does not need an internet connection to play online.


:lol:

[siLciR]
Community User Level: 2
Community User Level: 2
Posts: 150
Joined: Sun Nov 02, 2008 11:38 pm

Post by [siLciR] » Sun Feb 14, 2010 6:41 pm

Chuck Norris never gets pwned in missile racing, they are too scared to get close.
Chuck Norris never gets off in Xbumpz, he levitates.
When he doesn't levitate, Chuck Norris declares that the grass is the track.
Chuck Norris doesn't do infiltration, the cage is too small.
Chuck Norris doesn't play in teams, His 4 members are more than enough.

User avatar
olio
Community User Level: 2
Community User Level: 2
Posts: 176
Joined: Wed Dec 27, 2006 12:23 am

Post by olio » Sun Feb 14, 2010 9:39 pm

dede wrote:- Chuck Norris once received the promised share on TS sales from JGG


-Chuck Norris stole money from dede's bank account and didn't get caught

-Chuck Norris has seen xzeal sober
-Chuck Norris knows all of wazaari's identities
-Chuck Norris can talk olio to take part in any league
-Chuck Norris never paid for the license, the code came to him in a trance
-Chuck Norris never needs to learn the cars. Cars learn Chuck Norris

User avatar
Whiplash
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 2325
Joined: Sun Apr 19, 2009 4:57 pm
Location: Bosnia

Re: TS Chuck Norris :)

Post by Whiplash » Sun Feb 14, 2010 9:51 pm

Whiplash wrote:-Chuck Norris thinks that he can beat Tijny in F1 league.

I knew it:
-Chuck Norris plays often with dede's nick.
-When Chuck Norris saw that Janne is missing today, he decided to play with Janne's nick too. He used left hand to control that another car. That's excuse for his bad 2nd place with it.
Last edited by Whiplash on Sun Feb 14, 2010 10:11 pm, edited 2 times in total.

User avatar
shyguy1001
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 1111
Joined: Sat Aug 29, 2009 5:35 pm
Location: United Kingdom

Post by shyguy1001 » Sun Feb 14, 2010 9:51 pm

olio wrote:-Chuck Norris has seen xzeal sober


I miss him :( When has he last being seen? I havent seen him at all since I started playing again I don't think...

Tijny
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 1514
Joined: Sat Nov 06, 2004 7:59 pm
Location: Netherlands

Re: TS Chuck Norris :)

Post by Tijny » Mon Feb 15, 2010 1:19 am

Whiplash wrote:
Whiplash wrote:-Chuck Norris thinks that he can beat Tijny in F1 league.

I knew it:
-Chuck Norris plays often with dede's nick.
-When Chuck Norris saw that Janne is missing today, he decided to play with Janne's nick too. He used left hand to control that another car. That's excuse for his bad 2nd place with it.
Aah well, then I guess there's no shame in my 3rd place.

- Chuck Norris is equally fast on all terrains - grass, sand and tarmac alike. Chuck Norris is not bound by the laws of physics.

Jurgen-NL
Community User Level: 4
Community User Level: 4
Posts: 719
Joined: Fri May 22, 2009 2:18 am

Post by Jurgen-NL » Mon Feb 15, 2010 5:33 am

xzeal sometimes is seen playing punaball shy ;)

- Chuck Norris never got bounched by a bouncy wall Chuck Norris makes the wall go bouncy
- Chuck Norris never has lags Chuck Norris creates them
- Chuck Norris found a way to teleport in punaball and owned Tijny 10-0
Dont beg for things do it yourself or else you wont get anything!!

User avatar
olio
Community User Level: 2
Community User Level: 2
Posts: 176
Joined: Wed Dec 27, 2006 12:23 am

Post by olio » Mon Feb 15, 2010 10:28 am

-Chuck Norris saw Picolo driving a whole race without stopping to chat
-Chuck Norris can make dede and Jarno become best friends
-Chuck Norris is Z
-Chuck Norris made Kometen a caring and loving person
-Chuck Norris can shoot swerve balls in puna

Jurgen-NL
Community User Level: 4
Community User Level: 4
Posts: 719
Joined: Fri May 22, 2009 2:18 am

Post by Jurgen-NL » Mon Feb 15, 2010 11:15 am

olio wrote:-Chuck Norris can shoot swerve balls in puna


:o i wanna see that :D
Dont beg for things do it yourself or else you wont get anything!!

User avatar
Whiplash
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 2325
Joined: Sun Apr 19, 2009 4:57 pm
Location: Bosnia

Post by Whiplash » Mon Feb 15, 2010 6:38 pm

olio wrote:-Chuck Norris can make dede and Jarno become best friends

kkkkkkk :)
olio wrote:-Chuck Norris can shoot swerve balls in puna

:lol:

User avatar
iBlaze²
Community User Level: 3
Community User Level: 3
Posts: 411
Joined: Wed Apr 09, 2008 11:42 pm
Location: England

Post by iBlaze² » Mon Feb 15, 2010 6:56 pm

olio wrote:-Chuck Norris made Kometen a caring and loving person


Rofl - and even he struggled with that one!

- Chuck Norris always wins at BumpzRacing. Even kill terrain cannot kill him.
- Chuck Norris does not crash into obstacles, ever. The obstacles move for him.
- Chuck Norris has never needed to ban any [COL] members. His presence is more than enough.
- Chuck Norris understands everything written by ILIKETURTLES.
- Chuck Norris knows why Invent Racing team collapsed.
- Chuck Norris never drives TSE-F1beta or any other F1 car. He can win F1 races with Spinner.
- Chuck Norris has never wanked any track. He sets lap records on his first attempt.
- Chuck Norris never waits for the lights at the start. The lights wait for him.
- Chuck Norris played ID_Random and didn't bounce.
- Nobody even dares call a yellow when Chuck Norris plays SCARTS.

:D

User avatar
Mike Nike
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 1131
Joined: Sat Oct 30, 2004 3:11 pm
Location: Germany
Contact:

Post by Mike Nike » Tue Feb 16, 2010 10:59 am

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!!!!!^^
It feels like i laughed more and heavier in this topic than in the past year and i laughed a lot back then^^

- Chuck Norris didn't even tried to find out Z's identity. Z was so scared of Chuck, he immediately told him who he is.
- Chuck Norris won in team mod - alone.
- If it's /damage 1 and Chuck Norris crashs into a wall, the wall gets damaged, not him.
- Chuck Norris was able to drive in ghost mode before TS 0.86b came out.
- If a blacklisted driver is in the server with Chuck Norris, he's not getting banned, he gets the message: "You have been roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris"
- The "c" behind a laptime originally stands for "chuck norrised"
- Chuck Norris has beat the buggy laprecord of Slikey ("0.000") by a half of a second.
- Chuck Norris is able to drive 251 laps.
- Chuck Norris car does not automatically slow down after race end.
- Chuck Norris can build tracks sized 8000x8000.
- Chuck Norris' reload missile time is always 0 ms.
- If Chuck Norris is not getting first place, he still gets more points than 1st place.
- If Chuck Norris is in the race with you, F10 stats show you the warps (earth quakes) caused by the presence of Chuck Norris.
- Chuck Norris can bump people in ghost races.
- generated html stats filter Chuck Norris, so the published lists of lap record holders do actually just show the second place holders
- Chuck Norris can finish a 4 laps race in 3 laps.
- The 5 minutes warmup in F1 (35 laps) is only 3 minutes long, if Chuck Norris takes part.
- Chuck Norris can play with 4 cars at once in a 2000x2000 track and wins with all.
- Chuck Norris can drive with 20 cars at once, being logged in 5 different TS folders - with just one license - the TS system fears to block him by telling "license is already in use".
- If Chuck Norris joins a full manual server, the server gets chuck norrised = the player who owns the server gets kicked and replaced. Chuck Norris can also join a server with 20 players on it without replacing someone. The next race will start with 21.
- Chuck Norris can drive a laptime in a default PB, XB or Battle track
- You can get "wrecked by Chuck Norris" in racing tracks without kill terrain.
- Chuck Norris can drive through any god damned nervy haybales and tyres!!! :D
- Chuck Norris can complete a lap without passing each checkline.
- If Chuck Norris joins a server, he gets automatically logged in as admin.
- If Chuck Norris bans someone, a full banlist of 20 players/IPs gets added by 1 spot permanently.
- If Chuck Norris disables someone, he is disabled for life.
- If Chuck Norris scores a goal in punaball, he scores the assist too.
- If Chuck Norris would play 1 vs 19 in PB, XB or Battle, the teams would be unbalanced - no need to say why.
- If Chuck Norris gets disconnected in the middle of the race until the end, he is still going to win.
- If Chuck Norris drives on JA_ or JC_ tracks, he does not have any hash errors.
- Chuck Norris can do the jump in Punatianens long jump track - with Spinner!
- Chuck Norris does not crash into bridge bugs - he is able to destroy "invisible" walls by driving through them.
- Chuck Norris can disable someone without even touching him.
- Chuck Norris never gets stuck in the track - if, then the track gets stuck in Chuck Norris.
- If there is a vote for next cups' cuptype, car or ghostmode, then if Chuck Norris votes, the other people's votes do not matter.
- If Chuck Norris accelerates, he is just moving the earth to his back with his tyres.
- Chuck Norris can beat J_PerfectLine RDP-AntiSlider record (1.654 by Mike Nike) by 0.1 seconds.
- Chuck Norris can type chatlines while driving optimal zig-zag curves.
- Chuck Norris' ping is 0 ms and his prediction time is under 0!
- If there are no points given by /points in a cup, Chuck Norris is still going to win the cup with at least 1 point lead.
Last edited by Mike Nike on Tue Feb 16, 2010 12:55 pm, edited 8 times in total.

User avatar
dede
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 3314
Joined: Mon Apr 10, 2006 10:29 am
Location: Milan (Italy)
Contact:

Post by dede » Tue Feb 16, 2010 12:26 pm

I must admit that Chuck Norris is starting to have such a nice list of features I don't have..

Tijny
Community User Level: 5
Community User Level: 5
Posts: 1514
Joined: Sat Nov 06, 2004 7:59 pm
Location: Netherlands

Post by Tijny » Tue Feb 16, 2010 1:06 pm

- Chuck Norris never uses the track editor to make tracks. He reckons it's a lot faster to type his .trk files out in notepad.
- Despite numerous requests, Chuck Norris has never made AI lines. He fears that with so much skill on a single track, the universe would implode.
- Which is also the reason why there's currently no AI for Punaball.
- Chuck Norris has traveled to every single star that appears in a network game, along with all their accompanying planets. It is generally assumed that all lifeforms he found are now extinct.
- Chuck Norris' IP address is 256.256.256.256.

Post Reply